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Cathode Ray Blues

from Emu War by Plains Wanderer

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lyrics

The Helmholtz coil, in conjunction with an electromagnet,
steers some electron beams towards a fluorescent screen:
phosphor coated, so the electrons transfer to visible light,
cos how can we marvel at a CRT TV if its purpose can't be seen?
Receiving orders concerning voltage control
determining how much red, green, or blue light will suffice
to create any colour in our spectrum.
Every second theres 15750 lines that it writes.

Or something, thats all I remember son.
You shoulda took PE cos Physics is dumb.
Anyway, bugger off, the footy's nearly on.
Grab me two Tooheys, and watch them become none
like the beers are an electron, and my guts a positron
… you've got me thinking all weird now, now go to your room.

Oh, its the pre-match talk
such interesting statistics
highly pertinent to my enjoyment of this
man on man, flesh on flesh, head to head clash, brains rattling inside skulls
branch of entertainment
in which every time a point is scored or a scrum is packed
the broadcasters cut to commercial to get their pay.
So I'm really hoping this time around no one scores any tries and no one fucking knocks on…
cos I'm sick of these ads, man
beer advert after beer advert
maybe it was funny the first time around
but by the 50th time its really getting on my nerves...
You understand me right?
Its like, you change the channe cos you wanna get away from it
but there it is again, staring you in the face… what the hell is going on here?
I've already got my choice of beer,
what else could you possibly want from me man?
You keep showing me the same shit over and over again
I feel like my life is on repeat
overtime I sit in my seat
infront of my tv set
and I stoop into regret
I feel like throwing the tv against the wall..
It wouldn't be the first time

I have episodes thats all
I'll just have another drink
Calm my nerves
I fucking hate tv.
I don't mind if it hates me.
I can't help myself
I'm gonna lift you up from your pretty little cabinet
and smash you to little pieces.
Oh…
shit.

I probably shouldn't have done that
there goes a few weeks pay down the shitter…
well always keep on the bright side of thin I guess.
HEY SON!
Come downstairs
now you can see
the inside of a CRT TV
and figure it out for yourself cos
I'm sick of explaining shit to you.

credits

from Emu War, released January 26, 2014

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